Home » Homeschool » God Called Me to Homeschooling
I have a favor to ask of you.
2) Please read my comment on her post.
3) Please tell me what to do as a homeschool mom. I am lost and do not know what to do.
Thanks!
This is the wall I feel is being built to enhance control at the expense of liberty.
My child showed me a video about choices called “Leave the Party.” It is from an LDS General Conference Talk by Bishop Gary E. Stevenson called, “Be Valiant in Courage, Strength and Activity.” He talked about a choice made by a young man at a party in Japan. Then he said that the choices each of us make now will make a difference in what happens in our life, in who we become. Every choice helps to shape our lives. It is so true. I pondered it, and thought about our choice to homeschool our children years ago.
It also reminded me of this poem many of us love by Robert Frost called, “The Road Not Taken.” I have it in a book which has the poems illustrated with beautiful watercolor paintings. I really love these 3 lines the most:
“…. long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;”
These lines are touching to me. I like to put it into my life and my soul. “Long I stood” in 2011, pondering, studying, consulting and deciding. Long I stood then, next to my husband, in 2011 and 2012, he travelling beside me on the path. Should we homeschool? And (in January 2012, we) looked down as far as (we) could, to where (the path of homeschooling) bent in the undergrowth (at that time, that point was, until the next school year started. We just wanted to try it for the rest of that academic year, and be ready to put the kids back in school in August of 2012).
Now to go over these famous lines:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
For sure, Homeschooling is the Road Less Travelled By. How has our choice to homeschool our children “made all the difference?”
“The Road Not Taken,” by Robert Frost
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
I am going to help other women who are beginning to homeschool their children and need a guiding hand and a loving, listening ear. This is what I must do. I am moving on to a new step in my homeschooling journey.
What if I were the last woman on this planet left homeschooling?
I had to give something up in order to gain something in my homeschool this past year. Well, truth be told, I had to give a lot of things up to make homeschooling this many kids something that can function. I gave up facebook and all of the homeschooling facebook groups that went along with it. That gave me ever so much more time to actually teach my kids things and be a way better mom. I also had to give up much of the communication I had with my very local, very close homeschool friends. I did not give up all of it, mind you. I did not enjoy it, either. Because I gave up facebook, I also gave up facebook messenger, where much of that chatting went on. Even the giving up of the much chatting with my really close friends about homeschooing gave me much more time to lesson plan, to shop for homeschooling resources, to read books which improved my knowledge and helped me homeschool better and to spenc more one on one time with each child, enjoying life and one another and learning together.
To the other homeschool moms out there, it is not beyond the realm of possibilities for any number of you to decide to send your kids to a private school, a charter school, an online school or a public school in any given year. If it were to happen, you would defend your decision, perhaps on a blog post like this one. You would have many reasons. I do not know what your reasons would be. They are your own. I am telling you this, though. It would upset me to read about your decision. I am candid here. Even if you are a stranger and were never my support network, I would be upset because I get so psyched about the growing of the homeschool movement. If you are a personal friend, it would hurt on a more personal level, but would be guilt. “Why was I not there for her? Why did I not support her enough? Did she need me? What did she need from me?” This is because when we are in this, we know that it is tough. It is EXTREMELY tough. Support is so important.
I reflect. Am I homeschooling today only because of the support network I had when I started? Why, yes. Yes, indeed. I would not be in my 5th full year of homeschooling this year were it not for the support of people who, at the start, were complete strangers. I would not have even started had it not been for the support of a good and kind friend who supported me starting and helped me to start doing it.
Today, though, after 5.5 years of homeschooling, I am on a different level. I no longer feel a vital dependency on other homeschool moms around me for my continuation in homeschooling. I feel that I could be the last homeschooling mom on the planet. I know it would be exceedingly more difficult than it is for me now, but I feel so much more strongly about it. I am so much more experienced in it. I am not homeschooling because of the support network I have in homeschooling my kids at this time. I would keep doing it without any of the support.
I am a different woman than the one who started to do this in January of 2012. I am not too different, though. Then, I had to meet people who were strangers and start from scratch. This year, I have a huge library of resources and curriculum. I have a lot more experience and knowledge, too.
This having taken place in my life was a miracle. It was calming and peaceful. It has made the inner turmoil go away. It has made guilt and worry go away. This past Sunday as I listened to a talk in church and learned wisdom from it, my stress also went away, as the speaker advised me to “Enjoy the Journey.”
I am committed to enjoy the journey, but in order to enjoy the journey I must serve others by helping those who WANT TO ENJOY THE HOMESCHOOLING JOURNEY but are too overwhelmed, too worried, too concerned, too unsupported and too frazzled with stress to do so. My new NEED is to help others who are at the beginning of their journey, who are not yet to the point where they could and would homeschool even if nobody in the world did it but them.
Joyce Kinmont is a wonderful example to all of us who feel the call to help other homeschool moms to get to the point where they feel they could do this on their own. Joyce sends me E-mails now because I joined her E-mail list. Her E-mails are simple but peaceful and supportive. Her website blog, Every Home A School, is the same. Joyce is the first Homeschool Mom in the state of Utah (as far as I know) since it became legal again. She is the founder of the LDS Home Educators Association. She started this when nobody in the whole state was there to walk her through it. That is amazing and very courageous. If it hadn’t been for her, perhaps I would not have heard of homeschooling and would not be homeschooling my kids today.
She is one of my heroes. She does not support me and you in homeschooling because she needs the support. She is a grandmother now and has been finished homeschooling her own children fo a while now. She did not decide that she needed time to herself more than time to help us. That is crazy. Who does that? A hero does that. A Great Woman of God does that.
I am not going to tell you “I want to be just like her when I grow up” because I do not. I want to be me, but heroic in helping other homeschool moms, just like her. I will figure out a way to be a hero with my own gifts, talents, determination, goals and guidance from our loving Heavenly Father.
A Great Woman of God I will become. It will take time. It may take the rest of my life. I am determined, though, and I will become the Woman of God that Heavenly Father sees I can become!
{“There is no chance, no destiny, no fate, that can circumvent or hinder or control the firm resolve of a determined soul.” -Ella Wheeler Wilcox quotes (American poet and writer 1850-1919)} (Source: Thinkexist.com)
Thoughts as they come, influenced greatly by the Holy Ghost, as I have been praying and receiving answers:
I have been working hard planning college for my eldest. I recently prayed. I recently prayed to Heavenly Father for guidance. I felt strongly this morning that the plans for college are all wrong, in that I get a really bad feeling about it and had thoughts while dreaming and while in my subconscious, about the college plans. Because of this, I could not get back to sleep this morning. I hope I can nap later today to make up for lost sleep, but I felt an intense desire to commune with Heavenly Father whilst the children and all of the do-list item pressures are both sleeping.
Even though I have purchased guides and other learning materials for one CLEP and one DSST test, I am now doubting that this previous desire of mine to have my children get University Credit in 9th to 12th Grades, is a good one. I think it is good that I have a desire to give my children the best education possible. I am just realizing through God’s guidance, that it is possible that He would rather I teach my children something entirely different.
Yesterday afternoon, I was watching the YouTube video of a young man showing a good way to study and learn and a bad way to do the same, the learning being cramming for CLEP tests. I was watching so that I would know how to teach my kids well so that they could study for and pass many CLEP tests in their 9th to 12th grade homeschooling high school years. I often seek YouTube videos about such things.
After watching half of the video, it was time to put one of my children down for a nap. As often happens when doing this, I also fell asleep for a short time. In this relaxed state, a thought came to me which likely was not my thought, but was likely the Holy Ghost whispering to my mind and soul. I saw the young man studying and imagined him studying with the same intensity, the Book of Mormon, the Bible, The Doctrine and Covenants, the Pearl of Great Price, words of the Modern Day Prophets and the like. It occurs to me through the spirit now, that with that intensity, Joseph Smith sought answers from the Bible at age 14, before going to pray and ask God for answers.
If Joseph was 14, he would have in our day been ready to enter the ninth grade as is my eldest child. There were many other things he could ahve studied with the same intensity. Why did he choose instead to study with intensity, the Bible? What kind of a difference did it make for him and for all of us, that what he chose to study with the greatest intensity at age 14, was the Bible?
This morning en la madrugada when I awoke to come commune with God and write my thoughts down, I thought of something else as well. Jesus did not find his first followers who were to become his 12 Apostles in grand, well-paid careers, but most of them as fishermen and very poor, humble people in humble occupations. His earthly father who raised him was Joseph, a carpenter. In Alma in the Book of Mormon, the humble people who were willing to listen, were those cast out of the synagogues because of the coarseness of their apparel (because they were poor as to the things of the world).
The state of these people was a state of not being busy taking on the influx of the thoughts and ideas of the world. That is why it was important that they be in the conditions they were in. The reason Jesus said it is easier for a camel to fit into the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter into the kingdom of God, I think, had less to do with money and more to do with the influence of the world. A person can have a lot of money and be close to God. Abraham had a lot of money and He was very close to God. I think it has less to do with money and more to do with this: Often those with money are those who sacrificed greatly to get that money.
The sacrifice to get the money in our day and time is the time our children spend getting the world’s version of “an education.” I distinguish is that way because God’s version of an education is very different, BUT what IS it? That is the question of this morning for me. What is God’s version of the BEST EDUCATION for my children?
Jesus took people away from the influences of the world’s “curriculum” and “educational standards,” and, in the most common, everyday and humble settings, taught them eternal, heavenly truths from God. He did know carpentry, I am sure. He also knew how to read and do math. He knew the basics that a child learns until the age of 12. At 12, he went to the temple to teach the people there. He told his parents he was “about (His) Father’s business?” Age 12 in our day would be 6th or 7th grade. By the time middle school would have begun for Him in our day, he knew the scriptures so well that He taught the men at the temple things they did not know, and astonished them.
I can see that the kid of education He got was enough of the basics, but also a HUGE amount of the scriptures and the truths of God. He knew how to speak in parables when He was older. Did He also when He was 12? It is very likely He did. There is a great liklihood that His mother was so close to God, that she was taught how to teach the Son of God through the Spirit (from the Holy Ghost). Perhaps she taught Him in everyday things, as He later taught others. I am sure she taught Him about prayer, love, the scriptures, doctrines, service and obedience to God.
Can I not also learn to teach my children in the same way? In the Book of Mormon in Jacob 2:17-19, we find, “Think of your brethren like unto yourselves, and be familiar with all and free with your substance, that they may be rich like unto you. But before ye seek for riches, seek ye for the kingdom of God. And after ye have obtained a hope in Christ ye shall obtain riches, if ye seek them; and ye will seek them for the intent to do good–to clothe the naked, and to feed the hungry, and to liberate the captive, and administer relief to the sick and the afflicted.”
From this scripture I see many steps:
My kids have awoken.
Satan hates mothers. He is so angry with them. This is why an afront so big you cannot imagine it is going to aim itself straightaway at that target. Not only are women who sit kids on their knees and teach them, going to be attacked like never before, but women aging in care centers and retired women are going to be attacked with a vengeance. Not only those, but any woman who imagines herself pregnant by feeling her biological clock ticking, is the extreme of rotten in the eyes of Mr. Leader of the Body-Less. Bringing kids into this world? He hates that and wants to stop it!
Satan is sick to death with the lot of them.
He is also sick of women and girls being taught that being a woman or a girl MEANS SOMETHING SPECIAL!!! He is so angry about that! He wants EVERYONE EVERYWHERE to KNOW that a female is a nothing.
That is only one side of his anger, too. He wants EVERYONE EVERYWHERE to know that a MALE is a nothing, too. Fathers and husbands make him FURIOUS! BOYS who grow up wanting to date and marry make him SO MAD! Heads of families, leaders, PRIESTHOOD HOLDERS who learn to obey God? Full-Time Missionaries who bless the sick and the afflicted and baptize people? He is beyond finished with the lot of them!!!
Here it comes. These things will probably be happening next:
My advice is the following.
This is SO GOOD! Oh, my. You have to read this and share it with everyone you know who is LDS!
Our reasons change every year. I wanted to put down our new reasons for this academic year, from all of us combined.
Reasons for the Kids
Mom teaches us the gospel and we can trust her because we know she believes what we believe. The kids get to help teach each other academics. We can be with our siblings more. Mom and dad went to the temple together and Heavenly Father told them to homeschool. We get to do math and spelling! We get to do L.I.F.E. School, which is fun! At home, we get to eat whatever we want because everything we like is at our house. We can actually be the ones who make the stuff. We want to learn to make stuff. We get to play with legos when it’s recess time instead of only on the playground. We can play outside or with legos. We get to take naps at recess time so we won’t be tired. We can see mom. We can draw more. We can see our parents. We get our own library. We don’t have to carry a heavy backpack around. We can color more. We get to do lots more things! There is more time with mom. If there is bullying, then mom is there to stop it. There is nobody we don’t know. If there are, we are meeting them with mom there. Everyone in our homeschool has the same religion. We can learn about Jesus during the daytime every day. Jesus wants us to learn His gospel. We like to learn math and reading and writing at other places and at home. Mom wants us to do good stuff and clean the house so it will be so shiny and so people will like our house. We want to read and write our letters. We like learning on field trips. We want to count one two three four five.
“Sacrament Meeting,” by The Jackson kids, 2015
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Mom’s and Dad’s Reasons
We know God wants us to do this. He has guided us to do LDS Homeschooling. He guides us daily to know what to work on next and how to place our focus. We teach them the way we want them to be taught. We get to preserve love of learning. We get to teach them our religion and to understand, love and obey God. We get to preserve liberty by teaching them about liberty. We get to teach them academics to their levels, to all of them at the same time and in a way that does not make them feel inferior or superior to others, and which keeps their happiness and self-love healthy. We get to help the kids avoid tests, overwork, pressure and negative peer and teacher influences or abuses. The kids get to make friends and hang out with friends on their own terms and on our terms, and the friendships are more genuine and good because of this. We get to do learning field trips as a family a lot more than we’d otherwise get to. We get to set our own standards and parameters for every subject. If something is not working, we can change and fix it immediately and there is no red tape or beaurocracy involved. We have no convincing of others to do to change things—We just change them. We are accustomed to each other and nobody has to adjust to a new teacher. The teacher is mom and she loves the kid the way a teacher would not because she is their mother. Homeschool is a safer environment. There’s not as much testing. There’s more individual attention for each child. We also disagree with new nationwide standards.
This is inspired by a comment on a blog post, wherein the author has just decided to homeschool. She askes in her blog post, for people to tell her what they may be, if ther are any tangible perks to homeschooling. Why, yes, there are! There are many. Here are a few to start with.
1- Hugs and kisses all day long, every day, from all my kids of all ages, is tangible and delectable.
2- Knowing immediately when something is wrong and being there for them right them to dry their tears and hold their cheek to mine, is tangible.
3- My child not being told by others what to like or dislike (fads) saves tangible money.
4- Touching trees and grass and garden plants and soil with my kids is tangible.
5- Playing with my son’s curly locks while I help him with his learning, every day, all day long, is tangible.
6- Being the one who is there to do cooking, art and science experiments with my kids, is tangible.
7- Feeling the Holy Ghost and love in my home on good days when everyone is peaceful, when we are learning the gospel and learning to sing primary songs and hymns together for our daily lessons, is tangible.
8- Being able to hold my child’s hand while he learns to hold his pencil, is tangible.
9- Having school-aged kids always sitting on my lap and around me, leaning on my chest and on my shoulders, daily, when others have their kids away from them, is tangible.
10- Touching the food my children will eat every day, is tangible.
11- Having immediate hugs, touches on the shoulder, and so forth, when I have a bad moment or a bad day, is tangible. Here is an example. I was going through a miscarriage for 6 weeks. My pre-teen daughter was always hugging me and crying with me. She was great. I cannot imagine how much tougher it would have been to go through this without her by my side!
I could go on forever…
Mosiah 8:18 “And it came to pass that he said unto them: Behold, here are the waters of Mormon (for thus were they called) and now, as ye are desirous to come into the fold of God, and to be called his people, and are willing to bear one another’s burdens, that they may be light;”
A homeschool mom has had a very difficult days, weeks, months and years. She has had ups and downs just like you have. The difference between a homeschool mom and other women, though, is that when other women say their lives are difficult, people do not usually tell them to quit whatever it is they are doing because what they are doing is futile or too difficult.
If a woman works as a nurse and tells her friends about the difficulties of working with doctors, for example, other women do not tell them, “If is is so hard, then quit being a nurse!” or, “That is why I am not a nurse!”
However, when a homeschool mom says to another person, “I am having a rough time with (this or that),” without hesitation, the other person says something like, “Then quit homeschooling!” or “That is why I do not homeschool!”
For a homeschool mom, taking the risk of telling you that homeschooling is very hard, is a risk. That risk is a big deal. She has heard from many, that she should stop homeschooling if it is so hard. She wants you to be a listening ear or a sounding board. She is testing the waters with you. She will test the waters with many, until she finds someone who will allow her to have frailties, to not have to pretend she is someone she is not. She does not want to stop being a homeschool mom because she feels overwhelmed, just like mothers do not want to stop being mothers when they feel overwhelmed.
Next time you feel like saying to a homeschool mom, that because what she does is too hard, she should quit, remember that she could have been a dear friend. This homeschool mom may not risk being truthful with you again. She may add you to the bottom of her extremely long list of people to whom she cannot vent.
Is it the duty of a homeschool mom to bear this life without complaint? Must she live life telling everyone homeschool is going perfectly, even if it is not, because of potential passing of judgement about her incompetencies? Does the homeschool mom not get your part of “bear one another’s burdens that they may be light,” because she has chosen a path of which you do not approve?
Please do not be a person she knows she cannot vent to, or dares not try venting to for the first time. She needs to vent. It is a healthy thing all women must do to keep their sanity. She who homeschools is not extra-human. She is NOT more amazing than other women. She does not think she is. She is humble and does not think she is better than you because she has chosen this different path. No, she is not judging you, so please allow her the same courtesy. She is a normal, everyday woman, as unique and complicated as any other woman, who needs listening and caring from other women, just like all other women. Just like all other women, she needs a sounding board. Please do not tell her to quit telling you the truth by telling her that if homeschooling is so hard, she should quit.
Instead, support her as a friend supports a friend. This is what we homeschool moms crave. We need badly, people who listen and empathize, but do not tell us to quit homeschooling. So, please, whether you understand the homeschool thing or not; Whether or not you support it or agree with it, Support the woman. She is a child of God, and she has burdens that she would like to tell you about. Just listen. All she needs is a listener. Be that person for her!
Perhaps instead of telling her to quit, you can say,”Oh, that must be hard.” Then you can tell her you also have troubles, and she will listen to you, too. She will then say to you, “Oh, that also must be hard.” You do not have to have the exact same life to be friends. Friends are just people who support one another. They listen to one another. They are there for each other. Just be that for a homeschool mom! She will be so relieved to have finally found someone.
I was fiddling with percentages of:
1) all-inclusive, wordly, teachers not exclusively LDS, secular, fitting in with the homeschool community, etc.
compared to percentage of:
2) exclusive, Godly, teachers exclusively LDS active members, gospel-based, standing out from the rest of the homeschool community.
I wish to figure out what percentages I want of each for my family’s homeschool.
Examples of #1:
Secular Homeschool Co-Op Group
Secular math
Secular fiction reading
Secular non-fiction reading
Homeschool all-inclusive social event
Shopping at a store
Local Natural History Museum
Local Art Museum or Gallery
Local play
Dance class
Gymnastics class
Swimming lessons
City Easter Egg Hunt
Bill Nye the Science Guy DVD’s
Any Secular Movies or DVD’s
LDS teachers when not allowed to teach with LDS influences, principles or doctrine
Friendship time with non-LDS people
Examples of #2:
L.I.F.E. School LDS curriculum
Discover the Scriptures Curriculum
Reading the Scriptures, church magazines, listening to conference
Attending church or church activities
Going to an LDS family activity
LDS teachers when allowed to teach LDS principles and doctrine
Friendship time with LDS people
Activities or social events including LDS people exclusively
LDS-exclusive learning Co-Op groups
Family History research, reunions, dinners, etc.
Family Home Evening
General Conference
If I take everything I do in our homeschool, figure what amount of hours per year we spend on each, and then figure percentages, then:
What would the percentages be if I used these 2 categories only?
How do I want it to be for my family?
I have not done the math, but just looking casually here, I am guessing that less than 25% of what we do is in #2. I want that influence to be higher. I would rather it be 50/50 or maybe with the LDS influencers being at 75%.
Relaxed Homeschool Utah 